1. |
The Opener
03:40
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Tell me you never wanna see me again
and then keep showing up at my house
tell me you’ll never be in love again,
now you’re walking ‘round with someone else
If I was hungry then you were starving
and he was so sick but you were dying
now tell the dead man that you’re the one dying
treat them like queens until they disagree
and never reflect to think “wait…maybe
the problem was me.” Nah man, just keep
smoking weed. tell this one “Yeah they
were all crazy unlike you, baby.”
tell me that no one know me like you
do & tell me that my friends don’t tell you
the truth & maybe I’ll come crawling back to
you. like that was never your plan, right?
You worked so hard but we were just lucky
to ride those coat tails into infinity, & all
my success has got nothing to do with me,
yeah, tell me again how there just aren’t that
many girls in the music scene!
It’s another all male tour preaching equality.
It’s another straight cis man who knows more
about this than me. It’s another man
telling us we’re missing a frequency.
Show ‘em, Kelly!
It’s another man telling us we can’t fill up the room
It’s another man telling us to book a smaller venue
‘Nah, hey, come on girls, we’re only thinking about you”
Well, see how far we’ve come not listening to you
Yeah, just get a female opener, that’ll fill the quota!
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2. |
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He left a key hidden by the backdoor but
I never showed up. There was something
sleazy about it that made me wanna rob
the place & run. & I’ve been ignoring the calls, I’ve
been riding my bike with handlebars
through empty street in the dark, & I think
I’m getting pretty good
Maybe I’ll leave the house tonight, maybe I’ll
even watch the bands & maybe I’ll cry.
Maybe I’ll tell everyone I cried while you
sleep next to your wife, for the rest of
your life while I’m riding in the dark
on my bike with no handlebars, yeah.
And I heard it from a friend that he talks
to the primary school kids through the fence.
Yeah, you should’a seen his book collection,
it was ‘How to Socialise & How to Make Friends’,
yeah I guess we’ve all got our problems and areas to improve. & I know
one of mine is to go a night without sympathising with you
I can see myself living without you
& being fine, for the rest of my life, it’s
just me on my bike & I’ll wave to you as I ride by.
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3. |
The Face of God
03:50
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I had to leave because I had to say
‘no’ & ‘stop’ more than once, way too
many times. But you just kept trying to
change my mind. So I left, and it was 3am,
& I slept in the middle of my bed with
the comfort of my own choices. Yeah,
I bet you didn’t even think about what you did.
“Couldn’t be true, you don’t seem like that
kind of guy.”, “Not you, you’ve got that one song that I like.”
They said “he’s got one song that I like”
Now I don’t even know why I went, every
light on the way was screaming ‘RED’.
Now you’ve got me questioning everything I did,
& what would have happened if I’d done one
thing different. & I saw it, the face of
God, & he turned himself away from me
& said I did something wrong, that
somehow what happened to me was my fault.
You can see it apologists and hear it in the songs.
“Couldn’t be true, you couldn’t do that to someone”,
“Not you, nah your music is too good.”
They said your music is too good.
Kept saying your music is too good.
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4. |
Anna
05:52
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She packed her bags & went on her way
back to Adelaide. The cat’s been crying out
wandering all alone around the horse saying
“I really hope you’re happier where you are now.”
Just get it all out, put it in a song.
Just get it all out, write another song, Anna.
Bed bound doesn’t feel the same without you,
you are the other half, the missing parts, the
sleepless muse. And he said “I get a lot of
problems & one of them is always you, but I’m
fine with that, lets just work on it, I mean,
you’ve got yours too.”
Don’t get used to the isolation, you’re gonna want
it when you’re gone, when there’s no one with
any patience. & you think “Are they my friends
or do I just want something from them?” The
endless record spinning inside my head.
Tell ‘em what went wrong.
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5. |
Sagan-Indiana
03:55
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They said “Since the death, your absence has been noticed”
& there is nothing that I don’t owe the past.
Sagan-Indiana never saw where she was named after.
Follow the future back to me.
There’s a man filling my petrol tank to feed
his children on Christmas day,
I’m avoiding seeing my family.
& I buried my heart, comfortable stranger.
The last thing she said was “Don’t go digging up the dead.”
She said her house was like a friend. Keep the
lights on & stereo going while they were
mapping out the world, she was inside taking care of herself
Sagan-Indiana never saw where she was named after.
Said “it didn’t matter, I found me.”
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6. |
The Omen
03:58
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We all sold weed for a while & we
all made our mother cry. It’s a habit
that I’ve finally broken at this point
in my life. Now I’m kinda getting by, but
sometimes it’s hard to go outside and I’ve been
driving way too much, I’ve been too
lazy for my bike. Now as long as I
close my eyes I’m by myself, and I’d rather
be at home with you than anywhere else.
Now I’m turning onto your street, now I
love you like you never hurt me, the
planet took a real sharp turn before all
that space in between. And I really don’t
agree that your merit’s buried in your
gender normalities. & I promise I’ll take care
of you if you promise to let me be. Now
as long as I close my eyes I’m by
myself. & I rather be alone with you than
any body else
& I’ve never needed god, I think I kinda
knew that all along. To need a promise of
heaven to do the good deeds always
seemed inherently wrong & so I wrote you this song, it probably isn’t as
good as all the other sad ones & I’ll
pass out I your bed after getting
too high while you were gone. Look
at me, it was all for you and it’s
about time that knew that I’ve
loved you since I was seventeen. & for
all the things I’ve seen, there’s still
some wounds that I need to clean but
let’s move far away from here when I
finally get my degree. Where we’ll live
happily, get some rescue dogs and a
house by the sea, And I promise I’ll
take care of you if your promise to
let me
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7. |
Animal & Real
03:47
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Two am or something, and the past won’t
leave the present alone, won’t leave
me alone. & the underground’s not for
everyone, the things you learn working
the graveyard. & although I’d never
listen, your voice is loud in my
god damn head, boy. all the other
animals are laughing at me & you.
Yeah, it’s just me and you
Can’t escape this perspective or the
mark that was left on me, damaged
goods for the world to see, they walk
straight past and away from me, will you?
I know what those hands can do,
how I wish you’d use them on me,
like I was an instrument, feels good,
doesn’t it?
Yeah, I know I am lucky, this makes
me feel better, this makes me feel animal & reel
Then two am came around, drove his
car into the ground. Smother the pain
with sound, or is it just bringing you down?
Let’s talk about saving face, let’s talk
about putting me in my place, come &
then walk away, as long as you came.
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8. |
UFO Lighter
04:31
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It’s a question that I never learned to ask,
How far I’d follow you into the dark, & it’s
still a question that I’m too afraid to ask, how
far I’d follow you. When she saw that I’d
tattooed my hands, I said “Mum, I don’t
think I was ever going to work for the
bank.” & I said that I was sorry about
that line, I only wrote it ‘cause it rhymed.
We’re not those kids sitting on the swing set,
& I will follow you across the planet if we
could take our time, we’d get it right.
He was so bitter when he said “they’ll
offer you the world but they’ll leave you for dead”
& nobody tried to understand,
or at least act surprised when I said
that I wasn’t the one who was
unfaithful, but I can see why people
thought I was. Sometimes making love is
the only time I’ve ever felt love, there was
never any middle ground.
Now he sits alone in his one bedroom
apartment. Tells himself he’s happy & he
made the right decisions. & he expected
that I was gonna fail and back.
Well, fuck that.
I’ll wait for you, at the end of the earth
is where I’ll wait for you. You can meet
me there, see I never really stray
from here.
‘cause my head just gets too loud that I
can’t hear the words coming out of your
mouth. Sorry I don’t react the way you
want me to sometimes. I only wrote it
‘cause it rhymed.
Your silhouette against the fire. Where I
thought I saw a UFO but it was just
a lighter. And we nearly died, shit I’m
still amazed how we survived. You
probably shouldn’t let me drive.
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9. |
I've Got You
05:23
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It was the last time I felt like this, I felt
nothing at all. & I was fifteen when you
got sick, I still remember the phone call.
When they said there’s something inside of
You, so they tried radiation & chemicals
too & now you’re standing on the last
line, & so am I, I’ve got you. & you’ve
got me too, hold on, I’ve got you.
You said there’s broken links in your
brain, & I said “It’s ok, mine’s exactly
the same.” There’s still some things I don’t
understand, like the casual blindness toward
the cruelty of man. & a cop shot the
wrong guy again & they tore down a
childhood home again. Nobody seemed
to blink an eye when they wanted you to
pay to see the sky. I’m running out
of time, & you’re still running for your life.
There are days I wish you could forget when the
Broken glass cut open my arm & my
chest, & you just held me down as the
needle went in & out. & mum was
retracing her steps, when the doctor
asked her for a cigarette, a two year
old child in a hospital bed. I will never
run with glass again. Just like you said
“don’t be an idiot.”
& I know that when you go, part of me
will go with you to the infinite unknown. &
will stand at the edge of the divide, & I
will hold your hand & together we’ll dive.
& I will never meet a man that can make me
question like the way you can. A defender
of freedom, an advocate for truth. I’m
so proud that half of me grew from you.
All the broken parts too. I’ve got you.
I will always hear you when I
speak, I will always see your face in me.
We never found the subway
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CAMP COPE Melbourne, Australia
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